I haven’t blogged in a while. I’ve been cautious to blog this whole pregnancy but yesterday I reached a big milestone…. I am officially the most pregnant I have ever been.
It’s such a massive milestone for me and one which has been more overwhelming than I thought it would be to reach.
This is especially true after spending the day last week at 34+4 in hospital with contractions on a drip and having to have steroids for the baby’s lungs. We thought she was on her way. A great gestation for sure but I felt so disappointed about the thought of potentially not getting to term again. But all is thankfully calmer now which is fantastic news.
I’ve said before that I’d come to terms with the fact that pregnancy was always going to be pretty shitty for me and that continues to be true.
I am not the normal excited pregnant lady. I am not the pregnant lady in the gym. I am not the pregnant lady working until the end and getting on with her normal life. I am not the pregnant lady who assumes everything will be ok.
Instead I am the pregnant lady who is happier the fatter I get as it means baby is growing too. I am the pregnant lady who counts the days down religiously but wishes for as many pregnant days as possible. I am the pregnant lady who knows way more than she wishes about what can go wrong and worries about everything.
But above all of this, I am the pregnant lady who feels incredibly lucky to be pregnant, to be so far into my third trimester and to be well looked after by family, friends and medical staff.
I’m also the pregnant lady who is determined to enjoy whatever remaining time I have of this pregnancy as much as my mind will allow me to. X